Interlude: This is why I love PostSecret
Here is a post I once made on a message board, long long ago:
Screw you, automated public washrooms. Screw you and your tendency to flush while I’m still sitting on the toilet, followed by your refusal to flush once I’m actually done, no matter how frantically I wave my hands in front of your sensors. Screw you and your one-drip soap dispensers, your hyper-pressurized taps in front of which I must spend 15 minutes contorting myself into the exact position required for you to emit a three-second blast of scalding water. Screw you and your four centimetres of paper towel that you reluctantly spit out just as I am reaching the very very end of my very last shred of patience. Screw you, automated public washrooms, and your assumption that human beings are not intelligent enough to figure out how to press the necessary buttons in order to flush their own toilets, aquire their own soap, regulate their own water flow, and measure out an appropriate amount of paper towel. Screw you, automated public washrooms, and everything you stand for.